By Mathew Burton
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| Where's Tony?! |
Bonjour one and all! It’s great to be back after a short
sabbatical. Ever the ones to stick to tradition we were at the mercy of Mr Liam
Gledhill who is always first out to bat. Apologies from Messrs Dobson, Broadwith
and O’Grady. We didn’t get the memo regarding Dobbo so a cloak and dagger
absence, meanwhile Broady was wrestling a greased pig and Danny was wrestling
the bog – something which we’d all be doing in the dawn of morning. All three
were greatly missed and missed a great evening.
I normally rely on the generosity and will power of a
designated driver, no-one threw their cap into the ring though and so Uber it
was. Two stars for our driver I’m afraid as smoking in the car is a big no-no. Reeking
of Benson & Hedges we successfully negotiated the Gaza strip (aka Chapeltown)
and landed at the Stew & Oyster in Roundhay. All managed to follow the meet
instructions perfectly, bar one. Yes, you guessed it. Tony Tanner. A complaint
from the TTT in WhatsApp that he was boozing solo confirmed he was hobnobbing
in the Stew & Oyster in Leeds City Centre. All the steamy love making of
late must be affecting his concentration.
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| Does he look like a a 70's pornstar? |
No Guinness on tap used to be an issue for me – but less so
these days, although my head this morning would not agree that is necessarily a
good thing. The beer and conversation flowing, our resident social scientist
Vinny outlined that our generation of thirty-somethings had the luxury of
knowing and seeing the transition between landline and mobile dependency. Scott
then piped up, claiming that children nowadays try to ‘zoom in’ on a physical
piece of paper as if it were an iPad. We then imagined how a game of Guess Who? would work these days, given the
sensitivity of discussing a person’s gender, race or appearance – it could make
for an exhausting Christmas Day if you get that as a stocking filler. A great
game nonetheless.
“Get me a schooner of High Wire” demanded club Chair Liam.
No, I’d no idea either – it’s two thirds of a pint – most likely designed for
those who have a thirst and 10 minutes to wait for the bus or are waiting for
the wife while she’s in the opticians. It’s not usually a measure reserved for a
standard night out but what Liam wants, Liam gets. He claimed it was a strong
brew and so that was the sensible option to limit intake - although 3 schooners
later he may as well stuck to the norm. Maturing pickled olives in a jar make
for juvenile comments, not to be repeated here as the blog is far too high brow
for all that.
Bengal Brasserie - Oakwood
With that we moved across to the restaurant, Bengal
Brasserie wondering how the Oakwood branch would stack up against its city-living
sister branch. The answer; very nicely indeed. Kingfisher on tap, Cobra in
bottles, 2 poppadum’s each and a pickle tray – of which to Tony’s delight,
contained lime pickle – to others, an acquired taste. Four mixed starters arrived,
which contained the usual fayre and I’d like to be able to tell you how it
tasted, but as I was sharing with Dockers, after dropping my fork, most of it
had gone by the time I’d picked it up! I’m told it was nice and up to our high
standards. Mains ordered, it’s worth special note that Dockers went full tilt
and ordered his dish ‘madras strength’, which brought an inward chuckle from
yours truly.
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| Oi - You mug! |
The mains were brought out with unbelievable efficiency. By
now it was 1 waiter to 2 diners and each dish was served in a traditional and
unique vessel. It’s at this point I must apologise dear readers as things get a
little hazy from my point of view; perhaps I should have opted for a schooner
or two. What I am certain of is that everyone enjoyed what they had and true to
form there was plenty of bagging up (no diggity).
As Liam looked over the bill, continuing his commanding mood
he decided to do his best impression of Albert Square’s villainous Johnny Allen
and demand shots on the house! The basis for this was that ‘we get it at the
other place’. So, a special thanks to Bengal Brasserie for everything -
including the 2 Amaretto, 5 Drambuie and 1 Cognac which cleansed our pallets.
Matty
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| Silky smooth....the drink |
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