April's instalment, albeit held on the 1st May, looks set to
be the last before member Rick 'Ricardo Listep' Lister becomes eternally bound
by a legally binding contract of marriage #whipped, or for our female readers,
happily married. So with most members still nursing post-stag do hangovers,
there was a discussion of postponement, but host Crethy Broad rallied the
troops with a speech to rival Gibson in Braveheart - so on to Leeds city centre
it was. Starting in the Sports Bar (no idea what it is actually called), it took
approximately two swigs of beer for the group to cure their hangover symptoms
as we reminisced over a great weekend in Cork. On to Park Row and a new 'sexy'
bar called Decanter, which was to be become the crime scene for some early beer
'shelving' - poor conduct. The culprit is unfortunately, still at large.
Leaving Decanter, the club had a small debate on the next
pre-curry drink destination, with all members apart from Matty happy to visit
the Bierkeller. Having ignored his winging about having to consume a stein of
Guinness, we descended the stairs to the Bierkeller, not knowing what was
awaiting us inside, and it turned out to be the greatest ignorance of winging
that has ever been. The doors opened and it felt like the scene from Die Hard
when Hans Gruber and co finally break into the vault and the look of sheer
delight washes over their faces - "Merry Christmas"! The club had
stumbled upon the Annual Leeds Celtics Cheerleaders award ceremony. Basically a room full of glamorous, 'healthy' women drinking stein cocktails, all woopin' and a hollerin'. After checking our pulses, we headed to the bar, playing the 'cool' card about as well as Del Boy Trotter. Each Cheerleader took to the stage to give their rousing
speech, which was always received with cheers and applause from the club members - plus the fellow cheerleaders in the audience, of course. Shhhhhh, no talking, cheerleader speaking. And even though there wasn't a back flip in sight, needless to say - it wouldn’t have
mattered if the forthcoming curry had tasted like a bowl of week old Cheerios
covered in baby shit - this was the best curry club ever. Once the event
presenters, a sharply dressed Kid n Play, took to the stage for a closing
speech, the club decided it was time to cool off with a curry. So we headed to
our destination - Akbar's on Greek Street.
Akbars, Greek Street, Leeds.
As we walked through the doors, the club was still greeted
even though the place was absolutely packed to the rafters. Easily the busiest
restaurant the club has frequented. Escorted to the bar, it was disappointing
that we had to wait 10-15 minutes for a table, even though host Crethy had
booked us in prior to the evening. Still it was hard to dampen our spirits at
this point and all was forgiven once we were eventually seated. A quick nod to
our local landlord Joe who was dining at the adjacent table and it was time to
order. Give me an 'F', give me an 'I', give me an 'S', give me an 'H' Masala please
Mr Waiter - a popular starter choice once again, along with some Fish and
Chicken Pakora's thrown in. Keeping it simple for the chef, the order for the
main was a staggering 7 out of a possible 8 Akbar E Balti's - which is the house
special, consisting of lamb, chicken and potato. Order taken and the group enjoyed some well earned pom poms. The starters arrived and we'd
clearly worked up an appetite as they were devoured like Oliver Twist with the
munchies. Very tasty indeed.
The mains arrive and it looked like the chef had
gradually got bored of plating up the Akbar E Balti's, with the dishes
presentation declining steadily to the extent where Matty's looked like it had
been served up by a nervous Stevie Wonder. Still, it didn’t deter from the fact
that the dish was tasty enough and enjoyed by all for the most part. Over empty
dishes it seemed the tables had unwittingly participated in a game of Naan
Wars, with one reduced to crumbs and the other barely touched.
Coming in at £158 for 8 diners, Akbars was once again within
normal budget and was reliable as always for good quality food. With my own
personal experience of normal toilet movements, coupled with no reports from
other members, I must conclude that 'gas factor' was non-existent or not worthy
of comment, so thumbs up in that department. I guess there is only one thing
left to say…….GO CELTICS!
See you at the next installment of Cheerleader Club.
Thanks
Danny
